Five overlooked gems . . .

Got a few minutes to burn here at work before I leave for the weekend. Since it's Friday and I'm in the habit of doing movie lists on Fridays, I'm going to write about five films that critics and audiences have kind of pushed aside that I feel are pretty good little flicks. These aren't the masterpieces that made no money or the blockbusters that critics hated. These are just little films no one thought much of but I thought were good movies worth renting or even buying.

1. Unbreakable: This was M. Night Shyamalan's "failure," between Sixth Sense and Signs. This is the story of Bruce Willis's character who survives a train wreck with no broken bones. To say more would ruin the story, but it's a fascinating take on superhero mythology. Yeah, it's a slow moving drama. But the story is very well told. Bruce Willis gives what I consider the best performance of his career. The twist at the end is a bit obvious, but this is wonderful storytelling.

2. Undercover Brother I was surprised this Austin Powers-meets-Shaft type film didn't make more money at the box office. With Eddie Griffin, Dave Chappelle, Chris Kattan and Doogie Howser, this is one of the funniest, wittiest, bravest takes on race I've seen. This is a hilarious movie that only gets better each time I see it.

3. A.I. This is a dark movie when people were expecting Spielberg to deliver something uplifting like his other sci-fi classics. This dark fairy tale isn't totally successful. . . it's cold, warm, scary, downbeat, adventurous. . . the tones never really mesh. But at the times it works, it's Spielberg in interesting territory. Haley Joel Osment's performance is incredibley strong and Jude Law's turn as Gigolo Joe is fun to watch. My only regret is that the film should have ended 30 minutes before it's head-jumbling ending. A failure, yes, but a noble one.

4. Bowfinger: Again, a comedy that should have succeeded. Steve Marting is hilarious as a lying, scheming, desperately bad filmmaker. Eddie Murphy's double role as a superstar and his brother is the work of his career. . . you can't tell it's the same guy! Heather Graham gives another great performance. This is a very very funny movie that it's a shame no one thinks much about it.

5. Freddy Vs. Jason: This movie is made for those who love the '80s slasher flicks. It's great to see the two baddies go head to head. The humor and gore are perfectly balanced, and respect is given to both characters' mythologies. This is just great fun and the showdown at the end was well worth a nearly two decade wait.

Lunch hour thoughts. . .


Didn't get much of a chance to write yesterday. In training all day, doing homework during lunch hour, at school all evening and then a long walk and straight to bed when I got home. Sorry for those of you who were expecting something!

If I had to pick the one thing I hate about living in Michigan, it would be the weather. It changes so stinkin' fast here!! This week it's been in the 50s and 60s. Today it's 80. By Sunday it will be back down in the 50s. This whole roller coaster ride just is wreaking havoc on my sinuses, and today I'm suffering the after effects of a night on Nyquil. Yuck.

Had my meeting with HR today to tell me why I didn't get that position I interviewed for. I came away pretty happy. I'll admit I probably need some more experience supervising. But it got my name out there, I learned the different places I can apply, and I feel very patient with my career right now. It's going to be January of 2006 before I get my MBA, so I still have plenty of time to be patient here at Verizon. . . .

I'm really enjoying my law class. The class is pretty complex and challenging, but the professor is great at breaking it all down in the lectures. The weekly assignments are tough, but then again, I'm not going to school for an easy ride!

Should be a nice weekend coming up. Tomorrow night I'm going out with Erin and some of her friends for her birthday. Saturday I may go to Oakland Mall to hear William Hung's horrible voice in person; the afternoon will be spent doing law homework and in the evening Brandon and I are heading out to Memphis Smoke in Royal Oak. Sunday is church and I have my money matters course in the evening. . .

Training is going better today. It's at least moving quickly. And, I'll admit, it's been nice to have a week off the phones. . .

Well, that's it for right now! I'll write more tonight or tomorrow!!

C-Dubbs

Tuesday night thoughts. . .

For some reason, a quote by St. Irenaeus has been running through my mind all day. First off, this is odd because I'm not Catholic and don't have much dealing with saints, because I believe the Word says we're all saints. And the second reason it's odd is because for some reason the thought had been one I had dismissed as being unimportant the first time I heard it. Now, however, I'm rethinking things. The quote is:

The glory of God is man fully alive.

I don't really know why I brushed this statement off the first time I heard it. Perhaps it just seemed too shallow for my prideful thinking. Or maybe I was afraid at what trying to be "fully alive" would accomplish. Sometimes I think we can get so strung up on our desires that we forget that sometimes we have to let some things go.

But, to be completely honest, God has been focusing my thoughts on the subject of living for Him quite a bit in the past few weeks. Reading Piper's Future Grace was an eye-opening look at the role Faith plays in every aspect of our lives. His book Don't Waste Your Life, which I read afterward, was another trip through the subject of living life fully satisfied in Christ. Now going through The Purpose Driven Lifeis a daily reminder of just how much my life is driven by the Gospel.

I guess my idea of being fully alive has been changed. Before, I wondered how being fully alive really could be to God's glory. After all, aren't we told to experience life in all it's majesty? And don't we often live that out by filling our minds with art, possesions, and pleasures that don't often line up to God's will? But now, going back to the chapter in Phillipians I quoted last night and the quote from Lewis that I was mulling over on Saturday, I have to question things. Those things don't bring me fully alive. In fact, they're all too often hinderances to keep me from being all that God needs me to be.

And what did Christ say was the greatest commandment? "Love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all you soul, and with all your mind, and with all your strength." Doesn't that sound like it means all of us? And doesn't that mean that the best way to Glorify God, the best way to Love Him is to incorporate EVERYTHING that we are? To be fully alive is to Glorify God in everything we do.

Paul, in 1 Corinthians 10:31 said "Therfore, whether you eat or drink, or whatever you do, do all to the glory of God." Whatever you do. All of us. Anything we do. Every breath. Every thought. Every action. We're to commit to God. He wants ALL of us.

Which, I guess, brings us right back to where we were last night. With Paul, counting all else rubbish if it doesn't help us know Christ more.

The glory of God is man fully alive, indeed.

C-Dubbs

More fast food lunch hour thoughts. . .

Well, training is going a bit better today. Really going by fast. And they gave us an hour and a half lunch, which really helped me catch up on some homework, pay my bills, and do my devotions. Back to class in 10 minutes, though!

So, like I alluded to last night, I didn't get the job I interviewed for. It's not a big deal. I knew it was a long shot. Only a year until I get my MBA. Then I have some leverage...

Speaking of MBAs, tomorrow is class #2 of my law class. Lots of reading and writing. I like the law, but it is so much work!!

Well, 24 is getting down to the wire! After tonight, only four or five episodes left! I don't know how they are going to wrap everything up. . .

Tonight also starts my American Idol boycott. Until John Stevens is off the show, I will not watch. How they could get rid of Jennifer--arguably the best of the 3 divas (who were ALL in the bottom 3!)--is beyond me. Why is this talent vacuum on the show!!??

Speaking of A.I., William Hung is coming to Oakland Mall Saturday. I may have to go see that! If Erin comes, he could sing happy birthday to her!

I hate sinus medicine, by the way. I took some of those 24 hour pills last night and my body has been so dried out and loopy since. And to make matters worse, the weather has been getting tricksy again. Snow this morning. . . but by Thursday, it will be 79 degrees!! What gives!?

Well, that's about it for now. Any questions, comments or complaints can be directed to cdubbs727@msn.com.

Write later!
C-Dubbs

To close out Monday. . .

I love the Apostle Paul. He was a man who's heart I wish I had. He had a faith that I covet. His love for God made him press on even when everyone else (even his closest friends) was giving up. Tonight I went to Erin's after work for the Bible study she was leading based on "The Purpose Driven Life." One of the questions that was brought up was, what would it look like to live a life that you knew had purpose? And my thoughts were sent immediately to Phillipians 3:7-8. Paul has just said how if anyone could have comfort in the flesh, it would be him. He was the pharisee of all pharisees, keeping the law and striving for God. But his words really echo a passion that I wish to have:

But what things were gain to me, these I have counted loss for Christ. Yet indeed I also count all things loss for the excellence of the knowledge of Christ Jesus my lord, for whom I have suffered the loss of all things and count them as rubbish, that I may gain Christ. . .

"I count them as rubbish." Wow. I wish I could say that about the things that I get worked up over and take pride in. I wish that I could look at my job when it doesn't go my way with interviews or positions (as it did today) and say, "it doesn't matter. It's all rubbish compared to Christ." I wish I could look at the movies and television shows I cling to and give them up and count them all as rubbish. I wish I could look at anything that tangles me up or trips me and say "I'm getting rid of them. They're all rubbish."

Because isn't that the goal as we begin to focus on Christ? As we focus more and more on him, we see the rest of the world begin to slip away. As we passionately pursure Him, we see the things we've lived for and depended on begin to seem just like what they are. . . rubbish. Trash. Waste. Compared to Christ and all that He offers, our job is a rotten banana peel, our relationships are soggy hefty bags filled with rotten meat, and our money and possessions are nothing more than the leftovers we toss to the dog. In fact, even our good works, the Bible says, are oily, filthy rags. Why? Because Christ is all that matters. He's the one we need to live for and pursue.

Oh God, give me a heart like Paul. Help me to look at the other things in my life that I stake so much importance and love in and realize that they are nothing but rubbish, trash, and waste compared to you. You are infinetly worth more than anything that we can put a value on!

C-Dubbs

Very Short Ramblings. . .

Rather boring day here today. Started a two-week training session for a new billing system at work and it's crawling!! I need to get a chai with some major caffeine in it before I return from my lunch. . .

Yesterday was a pretty good Sunday. Church was good. Lunch with my S.S. class after was fun. Took a long nap. Worked out a bit. Went to Erin's and watched TV and talked for a bit (we're cool now, officially.) Went home and slept. . .

Trying to catch up on my law homework during lunch. Interesting stuff, but A LOT of reading and writing involved. Oh how I miss the good ol' days of Power Point presentations!!

Going to a Bible Study at Erin's tonight based on "The Purpose Driven Life." Should be fun. It's a really good book. . .

Pretty busy week here. Tonight is Bible Study, tomorrow is 24 with my dad (and a trip to the gym if I can fit it in.) Wednesday is school. Thursday are the shows (only 2 Friends episodes left!) Friday I think I'm taking Erin out for her birthday. Saturday no plans (although William Hung is at the mall at noon!) Sunday is church and then the whole viciouis cycle starts again!

Well, I have 10 minutes to grab my caffeine and head back to training! Argh!

C-dubbs

And another weekend draws to a close too soon . . .

Well, it's that typical time on Sunday night when I'm closing out the weekend and preparing for Monday morning. I'm a bit frustrated tonight because I have to go out to Rite Aid at 12 and Dequindre to at midnight to pick up some prescriptions!! But that's my own fault for not calling them in this afternoon.

Pretty fine day today. Church was good. It was good to be back, really. Service and sermon were all very good. Went to dinner with my Sunday School class afterward. Took a long nap. Went to the fitness center to work out a bit. Then I went to Erin's where we watched the finale of "The Apprentice" that we still hadn't seen and Alias--which is a show I wish I was more into. It's very well done, but just so complex that i'm so lost when I watch.

We talked a bit about our fight this week. We're officially cool now. Really, I don't know why God has blessed me with a friend like her, who's so brutally honest and direct and willing to confront me, but still loving enough to put the past behind her and move on. Really, she's a great friend.

I wanted to write some more, but I need to head out to pick up the prescriptions. Then it is home and in bed! Got training at 8 tomorrow for our new biling system at work.

C-Dubbs

Thy Mercy
Caedmon's Call

Thy mercy my God is the theme of my song,
The joy of my heart, and the boast of my tongue.
Thy free grace alone, from the first to the last,
Hath won my affection and bound my soul fast.

Without Thy sweet mercy, I could not live here.
Sin would reduce me to utter despair,
But through Thy free goodness, my spirit's revived
And He that first made me still keeps me alive.

Thy mercy is more than a match for my heart,
Which wonders to feel its own hardness depart.
Dissolved by Thy goodness, I fall to the ground
And weep for the praise of the mercy I've found.

(Hallelujah, Hallelujah, Hallelujah)
Hallelujah
(Hallelujah, Hallelujah, Hallelujah)

Great Father of mercies, Thy goodness I own
In the covenant love of Thy crucified Son.
All praise to the Spirit, Whose whisper divine
Seals mercy and pardon and righteousness mine.
All praise to the Spirit, Whose whisper divine
Seals mercy and pardon and righteousness mine.

Well, Hallelujah
Hallelujah (Hallelujah)
Well, Hallelujah

A Walk Down Memory Lane. . .

Uneventful Saturday night here. I watched Something's Gotta Give with Jack Nicholson and Diane Keaton tonight, which was a very cute, funny romantic comedy. Highly recommend it (ironically, my other choice--Almost Famous--happened to be on ABC!)

Anyway, I think I should probably abstain from watching romantic comedies by myself, especially on Saturday nights. I just felt very wistful and lonely after it was over. In fact, I had to go to Starbucks and get a coffee just so I could feel like I was interacting with people :)

But I got home and decided to look at some of my old journals I had found while I was cleaning my room. They actually go back 10 years, to my 15th birthday! I have to admit that there are a lot of different feelings I got when I read those entries. Embarrassment, humor, and surprise. Reading back at my writings from my teenage years really gave me an open eye as to how tough adolesence really was. All the anger, uncertainty, and fear. Um, good thing that doesn't last, right? lol.

I'm amazed at things I wrote. Some are just chuckle-worthy--like my excitement at making $5.50/hour ("soon it will be $6"!) Some are poignant, as I look at an insecure little boy who was afraid to talk to girls, ashamed at times of his faith, and not sure about the world he was in. And some amaze me because I can still see the things I deal with on a day in and day out basis. Struggles with devotions, impatience issues, dread with work, loneliness. . . man, the more things change the more they stay the same, right?

But I felt a great confidence in the fact that I could look back on those journals with a somewhat more mature eye. It means that God's faithful to complete the work he started in me. . . just like He promised! Who knows. . . in ten years maybe I'll look back at this blog (saving that the internet hasn't been decimated by nuclear war) and chuckle at the memories of an immature 24 year old. Who knows? I'm still young. I haven't made sense of this world yet. Don't know if I ever will. But you know what? I know who made the world. . . so I'll just follow Him :)

C-Dubbs

A quick thought on Saturday. . .

I actually had a pretty lengthy entry going on and then my internet began acting up. But it's been a busy day today full of running errands. I still have some homework to do and I want to be able to watch a movie (I think Almost Famous) so I'm going to just quickly discuss what I wanted.

CS Lewis wrote the following quote in "The Weight of Glory,"

"Indeed, if we consider the staggering nature of the rewards promised us in the Gospels, it would seem that Our Lord finds our desires not too strong, but too weak. We are half-hearted creatures, fooling about with drink, sex, and ambition when infinite joy is offered us. Weare like an ignorant child who wants to go on making mud pies in a slum because he cannot imagine what is meant by the offer of a holiday at the sea. We are far too easily pleased.''

I was thinking of that quote during Bible Study today. A few of the guys were talking about how unhappy they were in their job situations. You could hear the desperation in their voices and, I'll tell you, I did feel for them. But at the same time I worried for them. Because you could just tell that there was something in their voices that said "if I could just get out of my current situation, things would be okay."

I'll admit I use that rationale myself. Sometimes with my job. Othertimes I just think if I could find someone, settle down, and get married, then life would be going good. Or if I had enough money then I'd be doing fine. But the more I think about it, the more I realize it is wrong-headed thinking.

We've grown up in a culture that has told us the goal of life is to avoid pain. So we'll do anything to avoid feeling broke, lonely, frustrated, or "bad." And we'll cling to momentary happiness (even when we know it's only fleeting) just so we don't have to deal with negatives. But I don't think that it's a Biblical view at all.

Paul knew that frustrations, loneliness, and brokenness were necessary. In 2 Corinthians 4:17 he wrote, "For our light affliction, which is but for a moment, is working for us a far more exceeding and eternal weight of glory." He knew that the pain here was necessary because it's what God uses to burn away any desires not focusing on Him and make us cling only to Christ. . . where true joy is found.

The problem is, we're so used to just avoiding pain that we seek our satisfaction elsewhere. We'll be "happy" at work or in a particular relationship because we know that for awhile we'll avoid pain. We don't realize that sometimes unhappiness is necessary in these areas because they show us that it's in Christ alone that we can have our true joy and satisfaction. We're content with a drink from a rusty fountain when we can't hear the roar of the river around the corner. And that's sad. John Piper said (and yeah, this is the 2nd or 3rd time I've put it in this site), "God is most glorified in us when we are most satisfied in Him." Oh that we would all live that out day after day!

C-Dubbs

Kill Bill: My thoughts on the whole bloody affair

So I saw Kill Bill Volume 2 tonight. As you know, I had been looking forward to it for quiet awhile. And while it was lightyears away from what I expected, I have to say that it was a pleasant surprise to say that it exceeded my already high expectations.

Some people will disagree with me. They would be the people who say Kill Bill 1 and only walked away loving the violence, kinetic energy and bloodletting. And if they went in expecting a rehash of Volume 1, I can see why they would be upset. Only 3 people die in this film. . . only one of them in a way that can be considered gruesome (a very eye-opening moment, as a matter of fact.) The breakneck pace of Volume 1 is slowed down almost to a crawl here, and fast exposition is exchanged for liesurely Tarantino dialogue and character development. In fact, everything that Volume 1 was . . .well, this is totally different. Except both films rock.

But that's not fair. This, despite the major tonal shift, is one movie. And to be best appreciated, I think it has to be viewed that way. Knowing the skill and mastery that The Bride has in the first half makes you want to know the whole story, which the Second half puts together. Likewise, things said and done in the Second Half make a lot more sense when compared to the first film.

This film is Tarantino at his best. Volume 1 showcases his visual mastery, with cameras whipping around, music blasting (watch the rhythm in The House of Blue Leaves) and story-telling.

Volume 2. . . wow. What can I say? THIS is how you tell a story!! If the first part was a nice run through Japanese cinema, anime, and martial arts films, Volume 2 takes us through Hitchcock (a very intense buried alive scene), doubles back into some Chinese martial arts (a very well done training sequence) and then spends the rest of the time as a modern western. Nobody but Quentin Tarantino could handle this tone shift and all the homages to the great movies of the past. Most directors know WHAT works. . . Quentin knows WHY.

But what I got out of Volume 2 was a love for the actors and characters in this tale. If the first was all story-telling and pacing, Volume 2 lets these wonderful characters breathe. I was amazed, especially after the wafer thin first volume, that each character lived and breathed in this world. Michael Madsen, who has been woefully unused since his amazing Reservoir Dogs performance, is great as Budd. . . sinister, pathetic, amusing. Darryl Hannah as the one-eyed Elle Driver really was amazing. She has a scene where she reads about Black Mamba snakes and their method of death that had me howling with laughter.

The action is great. There's a very tense burial scene. The showdown between Elle and The Bride is brutal, cringe-inducing, and--at the end--even a bit icky.

But that brings us to Bill and The Bride. Uma Thurman MUST get an Oscar nomination for this. She plays the Bride through the years and does not miss a beat--going from infatuated college girl to scared pregnant woman to avenging mother. She manages to take everything the script throws at her and is perfect. She's never been an actress to get my attention, but I have to say that she earned my respect here.

David Carradine owns the show, though, as Bill. How someone capable of doing something so wicked and diabolical can come off as likable and . . . well, cool, is amazing. I liked Bill. I understood Bill. He was a good guy. And Carradine gets some great monologues to work with . . . his talk about Superman may be one of the best things Tarantino has ever written.

Ah yes, the writing. Ever since that coffee table opening scene in Reservoir Dogs, Tarantino has been known as a master of dialogue. That was sorely missed in Volume 1, where the talking was basically pushed aside for action. But in Volume 2, every character is unique, every line is brilliant, every joke nails the mark. And the script manages to work in some depth and emotion between Bill and The Bride.

Any negatives? I probably would have expected more flair in The Bride/Bill showdown. . . but the fight really is just punctuation to the emotion involved. In thinking about it, I think with what we know we don't want Bill to go away in a horrible way--we kinda like him--but we know he must meet his end. Tarantino did the right thing. Maybe it was a tad long. . .but you know what? I'm not going to quibble. This was a great end to a great story. Best movie of the year so far. . . and an instant classic in my book. :)

Long live The Bride.

C-Dubbs

While I'm in a Summer Mood. . .

Okay, it might be early to do this list. But while the weather is warming up and I'm still in a summery mood from Florida, I'm going to kill some time by making a list of the summer films coming up and my comments on them. There are 10 I am dying to see; 5 that I'm curious about that could be fun or terrible, and 2 that I refuse to get anywhere near. This will probably change, but here we go.

The Ten Big Ones (In No order)

Van Helsing:This looks like a big fun, scary, loud movie. I love the old movie monsters like Dracula, Frankenstein, and The Wolfman and it's fun to have them back. Hugh Jackman's Wolverine was the best thing about the X-Men movies and this might be another great role for him. And it's directed by Steven Sommers who did the Mummy Movies which were great fun (please, though, no dirigibles or smart alec kids in this!!)

Troy: If you've seen the previews, you don't even have to ask why this is on my list. That shot of a thousand ships is simply draw dropping. And the pedigree behind this film is great: Brad Pitt, Orlando Bloom and Eric Bana can all hold their own in action films. And director Wolfgang Petersen has a great action track record: In the Line of Fire, Air Force One, and The Perfect Storm to name a few. Add the fact that I'm a sucker for epics like Braveheart and Gladiator, and this shoots to the top of the list.

Shrek 2:Shrek was one of my very favorite films of 2001 and is one of my favorite animated films ever. Mike Myers and Eddie Murphy as Shrek and Donkey are hilarious. My only regret is it's dependence on slightly crude humor--Finding Nemo and Monsters Inc. proved you don't have to get crude to get laughs and are superior films. But still, I'm looking forward to this. Eddie Murphy's Donkey should be hilarious again and I'm looking to see how they further skewer fairy tales. Plus Antonio Banderas as Puss-In-Boots? I'm there!

The Day After Tomorrow: I love end of the world disaster movies. I have a soft spot in my heart for Independence Day. And this film from that director looks to be phenomenal. The scenes of monstrous storms hitting L.A., a tidal wave overtaking New York, the Statue of Liberty buried under snow--wow; it looks amazing! And actors like Dennis Quaid and Jake Gyllenhall can probably carry this film pretty far.

Spiderman 2: It's Spiderman 2. Enough said.

Anchorman: I believe Will Ferrell may seriously vie against Ben Stiller as the funniest man alive. From his crude frat boy in Old School to a so-funny-I-was-crying starring role in Elf, his movie work has delivered on the promise that SNL gave. And this should be another funny flick. . . a spoof of the '70s and Newsanchors. Is it just me or is that trailer with the phrase "I love scotch. . . scotchy scotch scotch. . . here it goes down, down into my belly" the funnier than most comedies?

The Terminal: I was under the impression that this wouldn't be out until Christmas, so I was so happy to learn that June 18 is when we get to see this. Two things got me interested before trailers even came out: Tom Hanks acting; Steven Spielberg directing. It's automatic. . . if one of those two is involved, it's a law you have to see and love it. Then I saw the previews. Tom Hanks returning to comedy? Spielberg displaying the light touch he showed with the great Catch Me if You Can? Catherine Zeta Jones?? This could be a great, fun romantic comedy. And it could redeem Hanks for making me disappointed in him with The Ladykillers. But Steven. . .get to work on Indy IV!!

I, Robot: Ah, July. Burgers, fireworks, roller coasters, and the latest Will Smith film. To be honest, I didn't think much of it when I first saw the preview. . . the robot looks a bit odd. But it's grown on me. Looks like it could be a fun little ride with some good sci-fi ideas. The director did The Crow, which I loathed, but I'll admit had an intriguing look to it. . . so if he lightens up with this, it could be a fun lil flick.

The Manchurian Candidate: Never saw the original, but I love a good conspiracy thriller. Denzel Washington and Meryl Streep? The director of Silence of the Lambs back in thriller territory? Yup, I'm there.

The Village: M. Night Shyamalan is a great, scary filmmaker. The Sixth Sense and Signs were incredible thrillers. Unbreakable was an underrated drama that told a wonderful story and actually had Bruce Willis' best performance in years. I'm a bit worried about his taking place in the 1800s (not a big period fan here.) But when his name is attached to a movie, I trust him.

Five Films that Could Be Great but Could Suck:

The Chronicles of Riddick: I loved Pitch Black, which this is a prequel to, so this could be a good fun sci-fi adventure. When Vin Diesel is at his best, (as he was in Pitch Black) he's awesome and-in my opinion-the only competition for The Rock with heir to the Ah-nold throne. And Judi Dench gives it some credibility. But the trailer doesn't do much for me. . . just looks a bit cheesy. But we'll see. I'll give it a shot. Can't be near as bad as XXX.

Alien Vs. Predator: First off in the negative area: no Sigourney Weaver. How do you do an Aliens film without her!? Second Paul Anderson is directing. While he didn't do bad with Resident Evil, he hasn't inspired in me the confidence that he can tackle such a series with a great legacy as Aliens (especially when my Halloween screening of the original was a terrifying reminder of how great the movie is.) But the trailer is promising. And I loved last years match up of Jason and Freddy, so this could be another fun battle.

King Arthur: I'm in love with Kiera Knightley, so seeing her decked out in battle garb is what's getting me into the theater. I also like Jerry Bruckheimer's films. But the trailer looks a bit drab to me. . . kind of a Braveheart ripoff. The King arthur story just has never interested me that much (unless Monty Python's involved.) But Antoine Fuqua is a promising filmmaker (Training Day, Tears of the Sun and The Replacement Killers were all good movies.) So I'm torn.

Dodgeball: A True Underdog Story: The preview for this was very funny. Vince Vaughn and Ben Stiller are always great fun to watch. It looks like it could have that silly Zoolander vibe. But, like all comedies that try and go for over-the-top silly, you can either have Zoolander (which I love) or The Waterboy (another story.)

Around the World in 80 Days: Every fiber of my being wants to dread this movie. It's a silly, Disney adaptation masquerading as a Rat Race type comedy with slapstick comedy and adventure. But the trailer made me smile. Jackie Chan is always a great deal of fun to watch. Arnold's cameo looks very funny. And Owen Wilson and Luke Wilson as the Wright Brothers is a hilarious idea. So even though I don't want to like it, I think it could be a Shanghai Noon type of surprise.

Two films that prove summer has gone to the cats. . .and that's a bad thing. . .

Catwoman: Halle, Halle, Halle. Where did we go wrong? You have an Oscar. You have been in great movies. You've already gotten the comic book thing going with Storm in X-Men. You got the cheese out of your system in Swordfish. You were already in The Flintstones. . . so your bad movie days should be beyond you! You're one of the most talented actresses out there. Why are you doing Catwoman? Why is anyone but Michelle Pfeiffer doing Catwoman? Why is there a Catwoman movie without Batman!!?? Why does your costume look so silly? Why am I wasting time and brain cells thinking about a movie I will never see?

Garfield: Bill Murray is the only saving grace this movie may have. He's the perfect voice for the fat cat. And after his wonderful role in Lost In Translation, he's allowed to wallow in some crap. But this, like Scooby Doo before it, is a desecration of my childhood? The CGI Garfield is so ugly. I refuse to believe that the stupid dog dancing around is Odie. Brecking Meyer as John Arbuckle. . . okay, that's alright. Jennifer Love Hewitt is the female Freddy Prinze Jr. . . a talent vacuum. If they touch The Smurfs I'm going to cry.

FRIDAY!!

Starting my ramblings early today, I guess as make-up because I didn't write yesterday. Just a busy day and I didn't get a chance. Had my interview in the morning, work got busy in the afternoon. After work I was so worn out I took a long nap and then had to hit the grocery store and then got a haircut. By then it was time for my Must See TV. So for those of you (if you're out there) who wait on pins and needles to read this. . . sorry. But believe me, there are more interesting ways to occupy your time than by following my boring little life :)

So the interview went well yesterday, I think. I will find out if I get another interview by the end of next week, probably. The position would be a supervisory position and I would be the liasion between our supervisors and the insurance company, dealing with FMLA claims, short-term disability claims, and attendance guidelines. And I'd have four people working under me. So, we'll see what happens. It would be a challenging position, which would be really nice. . .

Going through the book "The Purpose Driven Life" right now, because I'm going to start going to a Monday night Bible Study at Erin's based on it. I was a bit skeptical at first, because any book this popular (61 weeks on the Best Seller lists so far) is usually watered down, feel-good spirituality. But I've been very pleasantly surprised. It's a simple enough book that someone new to Christianity would be able to follow it and slowly get their feet wet. But, it's also the things I need to be reminded of day in and day out. I highly recommend the book. . .

So the weekend is here. Tonight I will--FINALLY--be seeing Kill Bill, Volume 2. I honestly can't remember when I have so looked forward to a movie. . . probably Return of the King. Volume 1 is just a great great great movie and I've heard nothing but raves for the follow-up. Can't wait to see The Bride finally get her vengeance. Tomorrow is a major catch-up day for me. Not making any plans. Just spending the day cleaning my room, closet, bathroom, doing laundry. And then I'll hopefully have some alone time tomorrow night just to chill out with some DVDs. I've been running pretty helter skelter since I got back from Florida, so some alone time would be nice. Plus I should fit some homework in there too. Sunday is church and dinner with my Sunday School class and that night I'm hanging out with Erin. . .

Next week is week one of a two-week training at work for the new billing system we're getting. Which means a week off the phones!!

Law class is actually quite interesting. The teacher really likes to teach (unlike others I've had) and knows his stuff. Should be a fascinating six weeks. Oh yeah, AND for the first time in my life I have a 4.0 GPA!!

If you're looking for some new CDs, here's a list of some recommendations I've been listening to lately. Caedmon's Call's "Chronicles" is a greatest hits/live album that is probably the best way to get to know what I consider to be the best band in Christian music. Lyrically, they are just incredible. Casting Crowns' self-titled is a good CD, especially "Who Am I?" and "American Dream." Jeremy Camp's "Carried Me-The Worship Project" is one of the better worship CDs I've heard because it doesn't just recycle old songs, but comes from his heart. And finally, William Hung's "Inspiration" is guaranteed to make you laugh long and hard as he butchers some of our classic songs.

Well, that's it for now!

C-Dubbs

Return of the rambling lunch hour rambler. . .

Well, it's back to work today. While I can't say I'm exactly happy to be back, it hasn't been bad. I've been pretty patient with my customers and I'm trying to keep things in perspective and maintain a joyful outlook on things. I'm here for the glory of God, so I need to make sure I'm living that out. . .

Got in today to find out I have an interview tomorrow for another part in the company. This would be a supervisory position dealing with FMLA inquiries. Not sure how it'll turn out, but we'll see. . .

So Jack is officially back. 24 has, for the past five weeks, been producing some of the best episodes of the series and that continued right on last night. No Kim trapped by cougars. I don't know when a show has gotten this intense, dark, and taken this many crazy risks. Having the hero kill his boss to give in to a terrorist demand? Suicide pills? A city-wide outbreak?? Only five episodes left. May 25's season finale is gonna be great!!

So I think Erin and I got everything cleared up. At least, I hope so. It's odd how I can know HOW my best friend ticks, but not exactly know WHY. And it was those things that I took for granted. I think we're cool now. . .

Back to school tonight. Law :( Not a big fan of law. So we'll see how it shall proceed. . .

Hard to believe it, but the weekend is actually drawing near very quickly. Kill Bill volume 2 is Friday night!! The rest of the weekend is up for grabs. We'll see what happens. . .

I need to get back to the gym. I ate too much on my vacation and did not excersize enough. I think the earliest day I have to hit it is after work on Friday or sometime after Bible study Saturday. Time to return to the machines. . .

Okay, my lunch hour is nearly over. Only 2 1/2 hours until I get outta here! Actually in a few weeks I start a 7-3:30 shift that will be very nice :) Until later. . .

C-Dubbs

Before I leave for the evening, here's a song that's been running around in my head all day. It's my favorite song, but really brings me a lot of peace. . .

Table for two
Caedmon's Call


Danny and I
Spent anther late night over pancakes
Talkin' 'bout soccer
And how every man's just the same.
We made speculation
On the who's and the when's of our futures
And how everyone's lonely
But still we just couldn't complain.

And how we just hate being alone.
Could I have missed my only chance,
And now I'm just wasting my time
By lookin' around

But ya know I know better,
I'm not gonna worry 'bout nothin'.
Cause if the birds and the flowers survive,
Then I'll make it okay.
I'm given a chance and a rock;
see which one breaks a window.
See which one keeps me up all night and into the day.

Because I'm so scared of being alone
That I forget what house i live in.
But it's not my job to wait by the phone
For her to call.

Well this day's been crazy
But everything's happened on schedule,
from the rain and the cold
To the drink that I spilled on my shirt.
'Cause You knew how You'd save me
before I fell dead in the garden,
And You knew this day
long before You made me out of dirt.

And You know the plans that You have for me
And You can't plan the end and not plan the means
And so I suppose I just need some peace,
Just to get me to sleep

Well, I'm back. . .

Got back home in Michigan last evening. Sigh. I wish I could say it's good to be back, but that would be a bold faced lie. True, I missed my friends. I missed writing in my blog. I missed my apartment and even my parents' dog. But I didn't miss Michigan and it's cold, gray weather. I didn't miss Warren and it's white trash residents and ugly brick buildings. And I didn't miss my job and it's whining customers. Sigh. Oh well, though. Try and keep positive.

Florida was great. The weather was cold and rainy the first two days I was down there, but that just gave us some time to hit the mall and movies (Waking Tall. . . not a bad movie, just not worth the effort to write up.) Wednesday Erin and I hit Pensacola to see her uncle, which was really fun. Ate at a nice restaurant called Hemingway's for lunch and then a nice Irish pub called McGuire's for dinner, where they had thousands of dollar bills hanging from the cieling. Nice day.

Thursday we just bummed around on the beach or around the pool. It was my first time on the ocean (other than a disastrous Myrtle Beach trip that doesn't count.) Really is there anything more beauitful and peaceful than a sunny day and a blue ocean and white sand? I could lie on the beach for hours and be a very happy man. And our pool. . . don't get me started! 12,000 square feet, this thing was pool on top of pool spilling into each other. Beautiful. Really, words can't describe it.

Friday was a day of running errands and staying out of the sun to avoid getting a worse burn than I already had, so Erin and I hit an outlet mall. Friday night was the rehearsal for the wedding. And Saturday was my last day to bum around on the beach and then the big event was Saturday night.

The wedding was beautiful. Right on the beach, with a calm ocean behind us. It was a small wedding and reception, so everyone had a chance to visit with the bride and groom. Scott and I (the two best men) gave the toasts and I think Ryan appreciated it. Really, just a perfect day for them. :)

Probably the thing I loved most about this trip was the fact that I spent some well-needed time with my family, including aunts and uncles, cousins, and grandparents. And it was so nice to be with them all. We have a very close family and so spending time with my Nana and Papaw was wonderful. And having Matt around and healthy, when this time last year we were worried about cancer, was incredible. God is so good!!

I also got a lot straight with God that I needed to. I'll probably write more of that later. But He helped me focus more on Him, when the distractions I have day in and day out were cleared away. And despite my comments earlier, I really may not be happy to be home, but I'm ready to go back to work and school. Ready to take all that back on. Why not? :)

Not everything was great. Erin and I had some sort of fight that I'm still trying to figure out on the way home. Haven't heard from her yet, but I don't know what's up. But that's not really something I'll discuss very freely in this forum.

So now I'm home. Today was a day off work to play catch up and I needed it. I had a paper to write for my business law class that starts tomorrow night. I had to unpack my parents' car, get my pictures developed. And I watched Kill Bill on DVD so I can be refreshed before this weekend. I love that movie. . . I could write paragraph upon paragraph about it, but I'm not going to do it right now. . . I'll wait until I can see Volume 2.

Well, I gotta go. Time to take a walk than finish cleaning my dad's jeep and then to my parents' for American Idol and 24. . . which had a killer last episode!! I'll try and write more tonight!

C-Dubbs

What was Saturday like?

So today is that day between Good Friday and Easter. That day between the horrible moment when the crucified Christ and when he triumphantly rose again. I've often wondered what that Saturday was like. I have to imagine it was dark and depressing. The followers of Christ had to wonder if their meaning for life was over. How would it feel to think everything you had given up your old life for was gone for good? I have to imagine it as being one of the saddest, darkest days in history. But thankfully, Sunday was just a day away!!

So we had our first service in the new building last night. I think it's going to take some getting used to, being in a sanctuary so big. But it's really nice. I can't wait until Easter tomorrow!! My favorite holiday!!

One week from today my little brother will be getting married. That's kind of weird, I guess. But for him, that's the path he's got. He wanted to get married young and I think it's going to be good for him. For me, I've been enjoying single life. Not that I'm a wild-and-crazy guy going after the chicks, but I've enjoyed the time to really get to know who I am and what I'm looking for. Sure, it's probably time to start looking at marriage down the road, but right now I'm content where I am. And I like the fact that I've learned that I don't need someone for my happiness. Too many co-dependent people out there.

Well, this is going to be my last entry until probably April 19 or 20. Tomorrow after church I'm heading to Florida for the week for Ryan's wedding!! A nice week on the sandy beaches, relaxing with a good book, a good friend, and good family. I can't wait!! It's going to be so realaxing!!

I will write all about it when I get back! For now, enjoy your Easter! Remember why we celebrate!

C-Dubbs

The List Everone Who Knows me asks. . .

While I'm trying to kill the last two hours at work here, I figured I would forgo the Friday Five I started last week and actually compose a list that everyone who knows me seems to ask about. That is, the list of my favorite movies. Now, I'm going to do a list of ten. . . but I'm also going to include five runners ups that I love just as much. . .just that some of them are newer. Now this is in no way a complete list. As a major film lover, there are probably dozens of films I could rattle off that I completely love ... and you may find me mention a film not on this list as one of my favorites. Deal with it :) But this is a good start . . .

1. The Shawshank Redemption: I wish I had seen this movie in the theatres, because I think it is probably the most beautiful, poetic movie I have ever seen. There is a scene where Andy (Tim Robbins' character) plays opera music over the loudspeaker, and the camera pans over all the inmates in the yard, looking up in wonder. That is the most beautiful scene in any film that I have seen. . .it chokes me up every time. But the writing is just as good. . . a conversation following that scene about hope is one of my favorite dialogues in any movie. The acting is top notch. But I think the reason I love this film so much is the way it makes me feel. . . hopefull. "Hope is a good thing, maybe the best thing. And no good thing ever dies," Andy says. "Get busy livin' or get busy dyin'." This movie is so inspiring, so touching, so beautiful. . .my absolute favorite.

2. The Lord of the Rings This is for the entire series. Never in my life have I sat in such astonishment as I have for these films. The sheer magnitude of the story and the special effects were enough to make me totally feel like a geek. But as great as Middle Earth is, it's the story that drives this 3 part epic. Sacrifice, friendship, heroism. Although it involves hobbits, elves, dwarves, and wizards, this is a very human story. And of all the things I saw, the thing I remember is Frodo carrying Sam on the slopes of Mt. Doom in "Return of the King." A classic series.

3. Raiders of the Lost Ark: A little over a year ago, I had the opportunity to see this on the big screen. Then I watched it this Christmas on DVD again. And each time, I get the same feeling. A goofy smile comes over my face, the adrenaline starts pumping, and I'm in heaven for two hours. This is the way you do an adventure movie. A great, iconic character. Fun thrills. Clever humor. I love the sequels, but none of them match the great feeling the original gives.

4. Die Hard: Again, going with the original here. This is the movie I watch every year while I'm wrapping Christmas gifts. And every time, I still get caught up in the suspense of watching John McClane dash around, fighting terrorists. Bruce Willis is a great actor, and this is my favorite roll of his. . . just so self-assured, funny, and smart. The action scenes rock. And still, there are wits, brains, and logic in this movie. . . something the sequels (fun as they are) threw out the window. Some may say it's in bad taste to dig this after 9/11. I say Yippe-kai-yay.

5. Kill Bill volume 1:I can't wait to get back from Florida so I can see Volume 2. Though it's only a few months old, this movie has zipped pretty high on my list. Yes, it's nothing more than an exploitation flick. Yup, it is all style and no substance. And yeah, it's bloodier than The Passion of the Christ (though much more fun.) But the sheer style of it is why I love it. Quentin Tarantino's trademark dialogue is toned down, but in it's place he displays a keen talent for music, visuals, choreography, and story telling. It's a rush of a movie, one that has you cringing, tapping your toes, smiling, cheering, and --best of all--wanting more right away. Can't wait for part 2.

6. Saving Private Ryan:Everyone talks about the first 20 minutes of this movie. And while I'll admit that sitting through the Normandy invasion was one of the most terrifying movie experiences of my life, I think it's the final moments between Matt Damon and Tom Hanks that really devastated me. His words "earn this" make us realize how much we take our freedom for granted. The battles don't get more epic as they go along, but as we learn more about these soldiers we dread the violence that will take their lives. It's harrowing, scary, moving, and a great tribute to those who gave their lives for our country. It is also the only movie to reduce me to sobs in the parking lot afterward.

7. Braveheart: Some people will find it to be heresy that I think this is more of a favorite than Mel Gibson's OTHER violent film. We'll get to that later. His story of William Wallace, though, is every bit as passionate, inspiring and heroic. It's a classic epic story of living passionately and being willing to die for what you believe in. He's a true hero in this film and it's a stirring call to action for those of us who live too often afraid of our own passions.

8. Say Anything. . . : Those who know me best might find this to be an odd choice for me, but they just don't know I'm a romantic at heart :) I hate romantic comedies where the characters are caught up in some plot that conspires to keep them a part. But I love love stories that deal with real emotions: how great it is to be in love, how scary it is, how frustrating it can be. These characters act like real people in love. And it warms my heart each time I watch it. I love this movie!!

9. Good Will Hunting: Say what you will about Ben Affleck and Matt Damon (although I respect both as actors.) A few years ago they wrote and starred in this little wonderful gem of a movie. Yeah, it's the same male bonding thing as Finding Forrester or Antoine Fisher. But there's an honesty to it that comes off as manipulative in other movies. Robin Williams tones it down and he's never been better. But I suppose I love this movie because I identify with Will Hunting: he's afraid to trust people, afraid to take a risk. This movie hits me very personally.

10. A Simple Plan: Most people have never heard of this thriller starring Bill Paxton and Billy Bob Thornton and directed by Sam Raimi, who went on to do Spiderman. And they're missing out on a twisted, emotional thrill ride. What would you do if you found millions of dollars in the woods? Would you keep it? And how far would you go to protect your money? Would you kill for it? No matter who you had to go through? This is a dark, dark movie. The wicked twist at the end provides an unexpected emotional punch. Billy Bob and Paxton have never been better. this is one of those movies I that I love and appreciate more each time I see it.

Honorable Mention. Most of these are films that are quickly growing on me, or comedies I feel that are deserving of favorite status.

Pirates of the CarribbeanWhen I heard they were making a movie based on an amusement park ride, I cringed. How could it be any good? But this was the most fun I had all last summer. Johnny Depp makes this movie worth watching with his totally out there portrayal of Captain Jack Sparrow. Kiera Knightley is beautiful. The story is a ton of ghostly fun. A swashbuckling deight!

Finding Nemo:I love cartoons, especially the computer animated kind. And Pixar has made the best. This little film is so beautiful to watch, the way the animation just jumps off the screen. But it was surpisingly also one of the funniest movies of last year (a toss-up with Elf). And watching it more on DVD I laugh a little bit harder each time. Funny funny stuff.

Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind: This is a newer one I just saw a few weeks ago. But I totally fell in love with it. It's a mind trip that plays around with an intriguing idea: what if you could erase the memories of that lost love? You can read further on the blog to find my detailed thoughts on this. But Jim Carrey and Kate winslet are perfect in this. And while being an ingenious head trip and great concept, it's also an emotional powerhouse that grapples with the idea of love and its consequences.

The Passion of the Christ: This is a weird one. I don't feel it belongs on my top ten list. But I also feel guilty for placing it here. It's not entertaining. I can't say it was enjoyable. I can't even say I'll watch it countless times. And yet, I think it's a phenomenal work of art. It makes you think. It makes you meditate on the sacrifice of Christ. It is beautifully photographed. It's brutal to watch and exhausting to endure. But it's also one of the truest uses of cinema for artistic expression that I've seen. While I can't say I love this film, I can say I sincerely appreciate it and admire what Mel Gibson set out to accomplish.

Tommy Boy/Dumb and Dumber: Again, this may be heresy for including it right after The Passion. But I have a soft spot in my heart for these comedies, that make dimwitted behavior seem genius. Endlessly quotable, fun to watch with the guys. Guilty pleasures all around.

Well, that's it! Any comments on it? E-mail cdubbs727@msn.com
Later!
C-Dubbs

Would everyone just shut up!!??

So I'm in a very foul mood today. Don't really know why. Maybe I woke up on the wrong side of the bed this morning. Maybe the weather getting cold and rainy again got me down. Maybe I'm just really going stir crazy today with vacation within my grasp yet not quite here. Whatever it is, I have been cranky, frustrated, and cynical all day and I feel like I just need to crawl into my bed and forget all about it.

Don't really know what's gotten to me. I'm not depressed, per say. But if anything is brought up, I just have a bad attitude about it today. Asked if I was going to see The Passion over the holiday weekend I kind of spit out "the movie's overrated. I have no desire to see it again." Asked if I was hanging out with some friends I just snapped "I'm getting sick of seeing them all the time." Sitting at work I rolled my eyes and snickered at every customer. I had to control my tongue in traffic. And even the most subtle nuisances of red lights, pop up ads, and even my dad vacuuming during the tv shows have ellicited sighs and groans and rolling of the eyes. Yup, I'm not much fun to be around today.

Part of the problem probaby is that I just need this vacation very badly. I need a week where I'm away from work, away from my obligations, away from my responsibilities and--this is going to sound horrid--even away from my friends for a bit. I just need some time to relax, unwind, think, and enjoy life away from any obligations.

The other reason, though, is probably more my fault. I have fallen into a rut with my devotions. Oh, I'm doing them. But kind of half-heartedly. I'll flip open my Bible on my lunch break and peruse whatever passage I'm supposed to be getting through. But my heart's not in it. And prayer? Don't get me started.

I guess the easy thing to do when I'm in a mood like thi is to look and complain about how everyone else needs to change. But if everyone's getting on my nerves and I'm the one getting frustrated, maybe the change needs to happen on my part. Maybe I need to take some time away from things. Maybe I need to focus more on scriptures. If I'm still frustrated with my job, I can keep looking. If my friends continue to frustrate me, I can always look elsewhere (although I don't think that's so much an issue with my friends as it is just my sucky attitude today). But right now all I can change is my attitude. I need to wake up tomorrow convinced it will be the best day of my life. I need to force myself to smile and remember that when I'm helping others, that's when I can find true joy. And I need to remember that those things are temporary--work, people, things--they aren't going to last. I need to be pursuing God's glory with an intense passion. That's what truly matters.

Hoping tomorrow will shine brighter,
C-Dubbs

Another Weird, Wacky, Whimsical Wednesday Weeknight. . .

Well, the night is winding down and I'm sitting here in my pajamas, Starbuck's cafe mocha by my side just letting my thoughts unspool tonight. It actually was a very relaxing, enjoyable afternoon and evening for me. After work I came home and took a half hour power nap that was EXTREMELY refreshing. Then I putzed around the apartment for a bit and then hit the gym. I had myself a nice, energetic workout and then headed back to my place for dinner. Then I sat on the porch and read for about an hour and took a nice, long, leisurely walk around the neighborhood/ghetto I live in. After that, I was all prepared to do some laundry, but the neighbor down the hall beat me to it. So I cleaned my room and bathroom (both well needed) and then got the laundry in. I watched who got booted off American Idol (Camille--why John Stevens aka Fireball is still on only goes to prove the stupidity of the voters!) and then after annoying Di with text messages to quell my boredom, sat down at my computer to write in this here blog thing. . . whew. . . and I'm just getting warmed up!!

As is usually the case when a lazy spring day is mixed with caffeine, I've got a lot of thinking done today. The first thing I noticed is that this weather puts me into a nostalgic state of mind. I remember this time of the year when I was a kid. I'd stay out late riding my bike, playing baseball, or shooting hoops in the driveway. And as I grew older, those nights were spent walking down the streets with friends in Royal Oak, sitting at the playground by Deebe's until 3 in the morning with Shannon, or just hanging out with friends until all hours of the night. . . ahh, the carefree days of college, before reality took hold.

It kind of made me sad. Not because I don't stay out until all hours of the night. I've adjusted fine to that. . . and I have enough responsibility that by midnight I'm ready for bed!! But I also started thinking about all the friends that I don't see anymore, who just somehow drifted away and I--in my stupidity or carelessness--neglected to call or write. I miss chatting with Shannon about nothing or everything, taking walks around the neighborhood in the late night hours, sitting on the playground and just venting about all the stressful things going on in our lives. Somehow those were the moments during college where I feel I really grew up, because it helped shape my opinions and my character.

I miss talking to Melanie on the phone or hanging out with her over coffee. I miss going to her dance recitals and laughing about how screwed up most our friends were. I miss the fact that we were close enough where we could communicate with just a raised eyebrow or a glance over someone's shoulder. Mostly, though, I just miss having that friend in my life.

I miss my friend Katie. Just a person who was so sweet, innocent, and positive. And I don't know why we never kept in touch when she moved to Chicago. She was a good one :) Watching Average Joe this past week, I thought Rachel reminded me so much in looks and personality of Katie, and how I miss just laughing with her or hanging out with her.

By the way, just because these friends are girls, don't think I'm ruminating on old flames. There was a crush or two with these three, but what I really miss is just the pleasure of their company. I just miss being able to talk to these girls. . . they were true, good friends.

I miss Aaron Lawless and Justin. Just guys I could hang out with and discuss spiritual matters with for hours on end and then turn around and laugh for hours about stupid things.

And don't get me wrong. . I'm not depressed here! I have friends I cherish deeply. Tim, Amy, Diana, all my friends at church are people I love hanging out with, even if right now I'm not as close as I was with those previously mentioned. Tim makes me laugh harder than anyone I know. Diana is great for hanging out with.

Brandon is the best roommate I could hope for (even if sometime his dishwashing skills leave much to be desired). And for years, he's been my best guy friend, always good to hang out with and laugh with and go to for advice. And Erin is the female counterpart of that, probably one of the best friends I've ever been blessed with! She's always great for laughs, advice, or just sitting in comfortable silence. So, I'm not lacking for friends. Just nostalgic.

Erin says that God brings people in your life for a season. And during that time, there is some mutual need that you can both meet. And sometimes, that season has to end. I understand and appreciate that, and I'm so thankful for the friends God has blessed me with over life's road. But that doesn't make it hurt less, you know? Sometimes I think about these people and I smile, laugh, and then get choked up. Because you may drift away from your friends, but you never really lose them or forget them.

There was more I was going to write, about singleness and stuff. But it's not that heavy, and I'm kind of exhausted now. So I'll get to it tomorrow! But for now I want to leave you with the lyrics to a song that Wayne Watson wrote years ago that deals with what I wrote about tonight called "A Season in Your Path."

Heard that friends are friends forever
But we don't talk much anymore
I guess that I've gone my way
And I guess that you've gone yours
Was kindness too neglected? On my list of deep regrets.
In spite of distance unexpected
Can we forgive but not forget?

Sometimes I think about you
Some old memories make me Cry
Remembering the good times makes me laugh
But all in all I'm richer for
The happy and the sad
And thankful for a season in your path

I guess God alone deciphers when people need each other most
Who will be the blessed receiver
And who will be the gracious host
And all a servant here can do is unto the Lord avail
Content at times to be the wind and at times to be the sail
If another winter settles on your shoulder down the road
Without a thought of what's behind us
Let me help you pull your load

Sometimes I think about you
Some old memories make me cry
Remembering the good times makes me laugh
But all in all I'm richer for the happy and the sad
And thankful for a season in your path

The perfect day to play hooky. . .

Well, just doing some rumblings from work today. I got in at 7:30 and saw that the weather is supposed to be sixty and sunny today :) Not too bad, though, because I get to take see ya time this afternoon and leave at 12:30, which is 3 and a half hours early. And no school tonight, so it should shape up to be a pretty enjoyable day. . .

I discovered yesterday that this job makes me so tense. Dealing with all these confrontational customers for hours on end really takes a toll. When I get home, my back hurts between my shoulders, there's that tension band around my head, and sometimes even my legs are tense. have to take a nap afterward just to unwind :( . . .

I need to by still a few more items of clothing before Florida. I desperately need a new pair of shoes. Actually, I could stand to buy a new pair of both Sketchers and tennis shoes, but cash probably won't allow that. Also, I need a new pair of jeans because I think mine are getting pretty well shot. . .

I really want to start writing again, especially since I'll probably have some time to do that while in Florida. I have a project in mind, and hopefully I'll be able to get some work done on it. I also want to get a lot of reading done next week. I have a Tom Clancy book I need to finish, a John Grisham one I'd like to read, and quite a few devotional books to go through. . .

After Saturday I will pretty much be incommunicado. No e-mail because I refuse to take my laptop with me to the beach. Also, no cell phone because my constant need to be available grates on Erin's nerves. . . plus, it's my vacation, so why would I want to answer the phone? Even for my friends, I'm going to be out of touch. . . because I'm on vacation and keeping everything at home!!

Okay, I'm pretty much out of things to say right now. I'll try and write more later!
C-Dubbs
cdubbs727@msn.com

Another Tuesday night and I ain't got nobody. . .

Ahoy there all! Well, it's wrapping up Tuesday night and I'm sitting here alone in my apartment, working on my blog. Good Tuesday night TV tonight. American Idol sucked, but we won't talk about that. 24, however, just keeps getting more intense each week. Great episode tonight, full of drama, action, twists, and surprising emotion. If you aren't watching this show, I guarantee you you're missing the best hour on television.

Does anybody really read this?? If you're out there and you read this, drop me a line at cdubbs727@msn.com. I'm just curious to see who actually keeps up with this.

There are a couple things I'm no good at. I can't fight. I'm a weakling. I used to be able to do Tae Bo, but now even a soccer mom could probably kick my butt. So I usually avoid any type of physical confrontation (the last time I got in an altercation, my little brother gave me a black eye that lasted six months!! That was about. . . sigh. . . five or six years ago.)

Also, I can't race. Now, that doesn't mean I can't run. I hit the treadmills at the gym pretty tough a few days a week and I can keep a good pace and work up a sweat. But when it comes to running in competition, being pit against others who actually know what they're doing, I'm a lost cause. I'm the guy you see in the cartoons, collapsing across the finish line with my tongue rolling out like some oversized party favor.

So I can really identify with the apostle Paul when he compared the Christian life to both a race and a fight in 2 Timothy, which was probably the last letter he wrote. ". . . I have fought the good fight, I have finished the course, I have kept the faith; in the future there is laid up for me the crown of righteousness." (2 Timothy 4:6-8). The book I'm going through right now, Future Grace by John Piper was talking about this tonight, and how the Christian life is tough. It's a fight to relinquish control of our lives and give it to Christ.

I like that Piper identified the contradiction we might see at first. Yes, Christ promised that his yoke was easy and his burden was light. But he also said that the way was narrow; it was tough to take the way that lead to eternal life. Being a Christian is both easy, because we realize that God is in control and holds our future. But it's also tough, because we don't like to lose that control. I'm going to quote from Piper, because I feel he says it better than I could:

But this ease of faith assumes that our hearts are humble enough to renounce all self-reliance and self-direction and self-exultation. It assumes a heart that is spiritual enough to taste and delight in the beauty and worth of God. It assumes that the world and the devil have lost their power to lure us away from satisfaction in God. If these assumptions are not true, then living by faith in future grace will not be as easy as we might have thought, but will involve a lifetime of struggle.

It's like the monkey with his hand caught in a jar. It would be easy for him to slip his hand out of the opening except that he has his fist clenched around a nut. If he loves the nut more than he loves freedome from the jar, then getting his hand out of the jar will be hard, even impossible. But what could be easier than dropping a nut? The battle that Paul and Jesus are talking about is the battle to love the freedom of faith more than the nut of sin.

Those words hit it right on the head for me and really hit me right where I'm living right now. I've recently come to terms with the fact that there are many things in my life that I need to change in order to continue my growth. My attitude needs a major adjustment, my thought life needs to be cleaned up, my patience needs to be improved, my temper needs to be a bit more mild, my courage and passion for faith needs to be improved, and--probably most of all, because it affects all these things--my faith needs to be strengthened. I don't have any problem telling you that these past few weeks as I've discovered this have sometimes been very trying, because as I try and fight the good fight and cling to my faith and lean on God for support, I still cling to my old ways and I still try and control things. Why can't I just open my fist and let go?

And to be 100% honest, it's been discouraging at times. Because I wonder where I'll continue growing. Is this is? Have I hit a wall? Am I going to be fighting this all my life? When am I going to wise up and start trusting God? It can get frustrating, especially as I see myself fall time and time again. But I found a wonderful hope in Phillipians 1:6, "He who began a good work in you will perfect it until the day of Christ Jesus." Christ has promised that our victory in this fight is assurred, even as we fail a few battles. And He's praying on our behalf, by our sides in the trenches.

And that gives me enough strength to fight another day!
C-Dubbs
cdubbs727@msn.com

It's lunch hour. So I must be rambling. . .

Woke up on time for work today!! Actually got here about 15 minutes early, so that was good. The nice thing about this 7:30-4:30 (or 4, when I have half-hour lunches) shift is that traffic on 696 in the morning is actually nice and smooth. And my good mood is actually continuing today, so that's good. After this, 3 more days of work and then Friday at 4 vacation starts. . .

So I'm boycotting Average Joe. I will never ever watch it again (I know that's a lie, but still, my convictions are firm. . . today). Every single season has ended with the star picking the person that is just looks and physical attraction, and leaving a nice person in the dust. Rachel was the perfect girl last night for Adam! She was sweet, wholesome, pretty, and had a smile that just lit up a room, and she really cared about him. And he picks whoever that skank was. Aarrgggh... People, always remember that this show only goes to prove that nice people DO finish last :( Whenever anyone tells you "it's what's on the inside that counts," it's a bold-faced lie!!!

I am seriously craving some roller coasters right now. As the weather gets warmer and May creeps closer and closer, my mind is drifting toward Kings Island and Cedar Point and some heavy-duty roller coaster action. Man, how good it will feel to grab some rides on The Beast, Millenium Force, Top Thrill Dragster, etc.

New 24 tonight!! Hopefully it can sustain the crazy vibe that started last week. . .

Only 15 minutes left on my lunch break :( But in four hours I can go home, hit the gym, and then hit my parents' for another great night of Tuesday television!!

Until then. . .
C-Dubbs

Three weeks of this and still going strong!!

Well, somewhat of a lazy day today, but it's my fault. I started a new schedule of coming in to work at 7:30 today but my alarm didn't wake me up until 7:15. Knowing that I would get written up for going in so late, I did the only thing I could do and took an e-pass, which lets me have a vacation day off so it doesn't count against my attendance at all (although it did use a vacation day I didn't want to!!) I felt a bit guilty for it, but that's why we have them.

So, it wasn't a bad day though. In fact, it's been rather productive thus far. I got a lot of important e-mails sent out this morning to school and job searches. I had a nice lunch with Erin at Buffalo Wild Wings. Hit the Bible Bookstore and got two cds that I hadn't heard in awhile for only seven bucks a piece!! And then I went to Target and stocked up on some important things for my trip. Plus I had a very nice time of devotion today where I really got a lot of things straight with God that have needed to be done for awhile. After I post this entry, I think I'll probably hit the gym and then see where tonight takes me.

The weather is beautiful, if a bit cool, today. It's sunny and cloudless and just a wonderful day to look at and even drive in. My thoughts, obviously, are elsewhere though, because I'll be on the road to Florida in one short week!

It's definitely a week to get some spring fever, despite the cold weather. Baseball starts up this week. Hockey playoffs start Wednesday. I'm not a huge sports fan, but those two things are nice harbingers of springtime. Easter is Sunday, the amusement parks start doing weekends on Friday, and the sun is out until 8:30 in the evening!! It's really a great time.

And it's probably my favorite time of the year, because it's such a great time of expectation. I can't wait to sit out in the sun, take long walks, just swim and relax. In a few months I'll be able to strap myself into a roller coaster and scream my guts out. Summer is on the way. Long nights are coming soon. I'll be able to open the sunroof and tear down the road with the stereo blasting and the wind whipping through my (short) hair.

And that, today, fills me with joy. Hope brings joy. Winter is a time when the weather gets me down. . . I would go as far as to say I probably have some seasonal depression. But when it warms up and the sun comes out, then man, I'm happy. I can take relaxing walks on my lunch hour. I can leave work happy knowing there are a few hours of sunlight left in the day. I can smile and relax and even now be optimistic because good things are on the way.

And that's how I need to look at life. See, life on Earth is tough. And it's hard. Work is tough. Balancing budgets is hard. Sometimes getting out of bed is a challenge. But Heaven waits for me. And while I'm waiting in expectation for that, I can still look forward to the blessings God gives me every day. Breath in my lungs. Sight for my eyes. Friends for my heart. Provision for each day.

And really, when you think about that, how can you not be filled with joy? :)
C-Dubbs

Parting with the weekend is such sweet sorrow. . .

Well, it's Sunday night and it's time to slow down a tad and start preparing for Monday morning. Not a bad Sunday at all. Church this morning was good. . . the sermon was very powerful, about the fact that Christ calls us to be His friends. Went out for dinner with my mom and some of her friends afterward and then caught up on a nice, long nap and took a nice, long walk. Then it was back to church for the first night of my Money Matters class and then out with some friends, and back to my apartment, where Diana was mooching off our electricity and watching TV (just kidding Di!! You're welcome anytime!)

Anyway, the Money Matters course was really important to me. I've been on my own for almost a year now, and I'm getting kind of used to this whole money thing and the fact that I don't have much of it. But it frustrates me to no end that I make a very comfortable living and yet I still live paycheck to paycheck. I do have a budget, but I think it's the discipline and the savings that I lack. And I guess the main reason that I'm taking the class is not so much to learn to budget--although I do need to get better about that--but to really impress upon my heart what God says about it.

I had some time to read the book we're going through and there was an example in there that really stuck with me. In the 12th Century Crusades, the soldiers used to hire mercanaries for assistance. Because it was a holy war, the priests required that the mercanaries be baptized before fighting. And the mercenaries developed a habit when they were baptized of keeping their swords above water. The point they made is that their swords were not under God's control; they were the ones to determine how that was to be used.

The point of the book was that it's often the way we treat money. We hold it away from ourselves and think it's ours to control. God can't tell us what to do with it. We worked for it, it's ours, we'll do what we want with it. But we fail to remember that EVERYTHING is God's possession. We are just stewards of what He's given us.

Obviously, for me, I take that stance with money. It's mine. I don't need to save. I can buy the DVDs, CDs, and books I want. I can see as many movies as I need. It's mine. God can't tell me how to spend it. But what else do I do that with?

Time's a big one. After all, I'm now starting to have problems being consistent with my devotions and prayer life. Why? Because time doesn't permit it. I have tv to watch, things to do. I have friends to hang out with. After all, it's my time. . . shouldn't I spend it how I want? Who does God think He is demanding some of my valuable free time?

Relationships are another one. I want to hang with who I want. I want to end up with the girl I want. And God is not going to show me differently. I'm going to use my relationships to have fun or a good laugh; and not worry about bringing God into the conversation (sadly, not even with my Christian friends) because that tends to be a conversation killer. After all, God can't tell me how to behave with my friends can He?

And work. I don't like my job, so I'll pout, have a bad attitude, and settle for mediocrity. After all, God got me here. I'm not happy with it. So really, I'm just kind of getting back at Him when I don't work hard. After all, it's not the career I'm going to end up in, so why should I care anyway? Just use it until something better comes along. If I'm not going to be there forever, why should I try?

Do you see what happens? It becomes selfish. I should be so grateful that God has blessed me with money to get by, friends to talk to, a job to support me. And out of that gratitude and love for God, I should be willing to hand it all over to Him and say "It's yours, I'm going to do what you command with it." But I don't. I get selfish and greedy. And I think I have rights with things that are actually God's. I'm just the steward.

The funny thing is how quick I am to jump on others for having the same attitude with other situations. Someone is getting drunk or sleeping around and saying "it's my body," I'm quick to say "no, it's God's. You have to obey Him." But when I'm claiming control of possessions I only have by grace or relationships I only have through God, or situations I only have as a gift, then I'm guilty of committing the same sin.

I want my prayer to be, "God, these are yours. Take them. Make me a wise steward. Help me to use these things to bring glory to You. They're not mine. They're not going home with me. I'm just taking care of them here."

Well, it's off to bed now. Work is at 7:30 tomorrow. While I do love going in at that time, it's quite early. So, until then, I bid you all farewell!!

C-Dubbs

The pain!! The pain!!

Well, bad movie night really backfired tonight. One movie we watched was Left Behind 2, which I won't bash on too much. Not a great--or even good--movie by any standards, but I'll award it points for earnesty. The gospel message was very well portrayed and so I don't really want to bash a movie that was trying to do some good.

But now we come to Gigli. See, the whole purpose of renting a bad movie is to hope you'll get one that is so bad that it's fun to watch. And that was what I was hoping was the case with this movie. But no such luck. What I ended up watching was the most pointless, boring, offensive, embarassing piece of trash that has ever crossed my eyes. This, my friends, was the worst movie I have ever seen! It was literally painful to watch. . . the boredom was immense. Getting through it was an endurance test.

How bad was it? Well, the language made it rated R so that it was only to be seen by adults. But most of the "humor" comes at the expense of a mentally impaired young man--which is truly juvenile humor. There's no consistent tone--it wants to be a comedy, a love story, a thriller. . . but in reality it's just a very pointless, very bad film.

And yet, there was probably a glimmer of promise in it. After all, the cast was pretty talented. Jennifer Lopez and Ben Affleck have both made good films (the fact that Ben Affleck has a writing Oscar and still liked this script baffles me). And then there were minor parts for Christopher Walken and Al Pacino. .. both are very well-respected actors with Oscars!! And yet, this was just awful. Awful awful awful. Words cannot express how much I hated this film.

Sigh. Do yourself a favor. Rent Pulp Fiction to see how to do a gangster comedy. Rent Good Will Hunting and Out of Sight to remind yourself that Lopez and Affleck actually do have talent. Rent Rain Man to learn how a movie can seriously deal with mental impairment. Heck, rent Glitter just to be remotely entertained at how bad a movie can be and still be watchable. But if you rent Gigli. . . I forbid you to read this blog any longer!!

Now I must head to bed where I will no doubt have nightmares of this atrocity over and over.

C-Dubbs

COLD FREE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

First morning in almost a week where I didn't wake up feeling like my head had been stuffed with snot (pretty picture, I know!) My cough is actually mostly gone as well and I feel pretty stinkin' good today. Got to sleep in until about 11 and it is a beautiful Detroit day today!!

So I went and saw Hellboy last night. It was kind of a spur of the moment type thing. Di and I were at Deebe's and just decided to go see it. And it wasn't a bad movie at all. As far as comic book movies go, I thought it was probably one of the better ones I'd seen, probably right up there with X2 and Spiderman, although not quite as good as those two. But it sure beat the heck out of Daredevil and Hulk.

But here's the thing: maybe I should read more comic books. I haven't picked one up since I was in middle school and Superman was killed. But somehow comics have morphed into demons and stuff like that. And it was a bit odd. There was a bit of me sitting there watching this demon with shaved horns, a fish-man, and some tentacle creatures all fighting and I'm sitting there just going "hmm." It was fun and energetic, and surprisingly well-shot. But if I was ten I would have loved it so much more.

And it sounds like I'm bashing the movie; I'm not. It's just the whole hell-thing and demons and gates and Rasputin and nazis kind of had me lost; I'll be honest and say I didn't really get what was going on. . . although I had fun being lost. But what I did really enjoy, surprisingly, was that this was a comic book movie that actually spent some time with the characters. It's about friends, fathers, and lovers. . . and for me, that was the most intriguing and well-made part of the movie.

In fact, the best part for me wasn't any of the action scenes, but a very funny sequence where Hellboy follows his crush and her date to spy on them and ends up eating milk and cookies and getting love advice from a boy. It was sweet and funny, and really played off how quirky the movie was.

So, would I recommend it? Yeah, I would. It's fun, quirky, and knows just how absurd it is. Not the best movie I've ever seen, but a good ride.

And today is the Saturday that is packed to the gills with stuff. I have to go get my suit altered, buy some clothes for Florida, maybe hit the gym if there's time, and clean the place up. Erin's coming over for another bad movie night--I believe Gigli and From Justin to Kelly are on the board tonight--and I can just do my laundry when she shows up. Plus, I did have a somewhat serious topic I want to tackle here, so I hope I have some time to do that.

But for now, have a great weekend!
C-Dubbs

The Friday Five!

Okay, the website I got these from was a little out of date so these will be from a few weeks ago until the site updates and gives out new ones. But since I haven't had it that long, I guess that will work!!

What was...

1. ...your first grade teacher's name? Mrs. Vaught. . . I remember she was supposed to be the meanest teacher in school, but I didn't mind her much. Although I thought it was fun to say her name so it sounded like "Mrs. Butt" Immature kid stuff :)

2. ...your favorite Saturday morning cartoon? I used to love the Smurfs!! Smurfette was my first crush. . . when I got a little older, it was The Real Ghostbusters (favorite show, not my crush)

3. ...the name of your very first best friend? Mark Kellems. . . we were best friends from like age 1 all the way to 12 or 13. We'd write these novels called "The Talon Kids" where us and our friends would have to fight ninjas. I saw him a few times around campus in college, but haven't really talked to him in ages.

4. ...your favorite breakfast cereal? Cap'n Crunch. . . because it hardly got soggy. I was also partial (and still am) to Cinnamon Toast Crunch.

5. ...your favorite thing to do after school? Come home and watch cartoons! Thundercats was the best!! I would also, on nice days, play with the neighbor kids or ride bikes.

Wow, that brought back some memories! I'll write more later!
C-Dubbs

Crawling toward the weekend. . . .

Back again on my lunch hour (actually lunch half-hour, today). I'm going to take to calling myself Sniffles McGee thanks to my cold that just won't let go this week. Actually I feel much better today. . . no longer groggy or headachey or anything. Just some sniffles and a rough cough, but some Dayquil should knock that bugger right out!

Working a 7-3:30 shift today, so I'm really looking forward to a quick nap when I get home. I don't care for coming in so early, but I do love leaving at 3:30!! I should probably be hitting the gym after work, but I'll probably just hit the fitness center at Regency Club and lift some weights really quickly. . . .

So The Apprentice threw me for a loop last night. I can't believe they fired Troy! He was my pick to take it all, or at least go head-to-head with Amy. My new favorite, though, is Bill. He's confident, good at what he does, and knows enough not to get too cocky. Amy--cute as she may be--is just a bit too full of herself, and needs to be taken down a peg or two. . .

So the weekend is finally here. Nice, relaxing one ahead of me. Tonight I'm hanging out with Diana for a bit. Tomorrow morning I have bible study, then I need to go get my suit altered, hit the gym, and then buy some clothes for Florida. Then Erin's coming over and we're continuing our bad movie marathon. . . I think Gigli and From Justin to Kelly are on the menu. Sunday's chuch. And then. . . .one week left until Florida!!!!!!!!

Okay, I should get going now. I have some serious stuff I want to write in here, but I'll get to it tonight or tomorrow when I'm not barraged by callers. Later!
C-Dubbs
cdubbs727@msn.com

More rumbles during lunch. . .

Am I feeling any better today? Well, the headache that was squeezing my skull last night has finally disappeared. But I'm still a tad congested in the nasal areas (I know, more information than you wanted to know!) Plus I have this annoying cough that is usually the sign of my colds' last gasps. So hopefully by tomorrow I'll be in tip-top shape to start the weekend. I think I can finish suffering through today. . .

We had a carnival thing at work this morning that I was drafted to help out in. So I got to dress up as a pirate for two hours and pass out stamps!! It was actually lot of fun and a nicer way to spend time than by sitting on the phones. . .

So you want to talk about depressing moments?? Last night I was sitting in school and we went to take our break. While there, I saw one of VZW's supervisors. . . who's there getting his Bachelor's!! I'm pursuing my MBA and he's getting his bachelor's and he's still higher up than me?! Where's the justice??

Gee golly willickers, it's shaping up to be a rather boring weekend. No real plans, which I guess is okay. I don't want to do anything too expensive with my trip coming up in a little over a week. . . but I'd like to at least do SOMETHING!! I think there are some movies that I wouldn't mind seeing. . . or just catching up with some DVDs. We'll see. . .

So it's 40 degrees and cloudy/rainy/snowy again :( This weather is so craptastic (yes, that is a word.) I think it's supposed to maybe crack 50 by Saturday, but then Sunday's going to be cold and rainy again. Typical Michigan spring. At least in Florida it's 70 and sunny!! I can't wait to be lying on the beach with a good book, listening to the waves lap at the shore. My first long vacation in years!!

Well, for once I've run out of things to say. So I'll bid you adieu until later!
C-Dubbs