Repentance

That's a word we tend, as Christians, to really keep to ourselves, isn't it? We love to boast of our freedom, salvation, and grace. We love to get in theological arguments about the trinity, the doctrine of election, the infalibility of scripture, and whether or not we can have a sip of wine at a wedding. But issues of sin and repentance aren't issues we like to take dead on.

Well, scratch that. Growing up in the Baptist church, I know that those things are often preached. But those of us in the congregation like to use repentance and sin as an opportunity to simply point fingers. The sinners, we say, need to repent. THEY are all caught up in sin. THE WORLD, we cluck our tongues, needs to repent from its sinful ways.

Of course, we don't listen to the old axiom that when you point a finger at one person you have to be aware that three more are pointing right back at you.

Like I said earlier, I've been listening to Derek Webb's "The House Show" recently. And in between his songs, he likes to talk a lot. Normally this would be the portion of a cd I would skip over, but Webb is a gifted teacher and I loved hearing his view on many things. But his views on repentance and sin really made me think today.

"The best thing that could happen to you," he says on the cd, "Is that your sin could be broadcast on the five o' clock news."

At first, I kind of bristled at that. Why would I want that? If my sin was broadcast everywhere, people would see behind this clever facade I put out everyday. They would see the ugly person I can really be. They would see the horrible things I do, think, and say each day. In short, they would see me for who I really am.

And that's the point that Webb's making. We try so hard to put out this image of ourselves as Christians that we're "doing okay." We're good. We're clean-cut, good boys and girls. We've pulled ourselves up by our bootstraps and we should expect the rest of the world to admire us and want to be just like us.

But any honest Christian would know what a lie it is to project that image. We're not okay. We sin each day. The problem is that we've labeled some sins to be worse than others. We don't realize our piety, self-righteousness, and bigotry is just as bad as the addiction, murders, rapes, and terrorism in the rest of the world. We've just made our sins socially acceptable.

We've become very comfortable in the American church with hiding our sins. And I think that's one of the reasons people are turning their backs. . . especially Christians. One of the biggest complaints I hear from other christians about the Church is "it's full of fakes." And that's sadly true. Instead of being open and broken over our sin, reminding ourselves of the gospel each day and our own constant need for a savior, and rejoicing over the fact that we're forgiven, we've turned Christianity into behavior modification. And that obscures grace.

Webb says the wonderful thing is that our sins HAVE been revealed to Christ. And that we need to stop pretending that our sin is not real because they are real and we need to rejoice that they are real and that our savior is real. And that's been a wonderful thought going through my head all day.

What would happen if we were honest and broken about our sin and struggles? Would our world trust us more? Would we trust each other more? Would we think more on God and less on how we try to appear to others? Would our gospel feel more relevant?

This song has been going through my head all day and is quickly one of my favorites in Derek Webb's already impresive song catalouge. If you get a chance, please check out his incredible cd "She Must and Shall Go Free" or his live cd "The House Show."

I Repent
by Derek Webb

I repent of my pursuit of America's dream
I repent of living like I deserve anything
My house, my fence, my kids, and my wife
In our suburb where we're safe and white
I am wrong and of these things I repent

I repent of parading my liberty
I repent of paying for what I get for free
The way I believe that I am living right
By trading sins for others that are easier to hide
I am wrong and of these things I repent

I repent judging by a law that even I can't keep
Wearin’ righteousness like a disguise to see through
The planks in my own eyes

I repent of trading truth for false unity
I repent of confusing peace and idolatry
Of caring more of what they think than what I know of what they need
And domesticating You until You look just like me
I am wrong and of these things I repent