Could it be?? A guy actually swooning over love stories??
 
Last night I had my parents' house to myself and I was exhausted from a long week at work, so I decided to stay in, grab a pizza and watch a few DVDs. At first I was going to watch Cold Mountain, because Erin loaned it to me a few weeks back and I still haven't gotten around to it. But all day and for the past few weeks, I had been hearing critics rave about the movie Before Sunset. I had never seen the first movie, Before Sunrise, although it's one of those movies that for some reason has always been on my list of getting around to see (rather odd, because it wasn't a hit. But the idea always appealed to me.) So I was at Borders, and found the original on DVD for really cheap, so I decided to pick it up and give it a chance.
 
How did I miss this movie?
 
For those of you not aware of the plot, the 1995 movie stars Ethan Hawke and Julie Delpy as Jesse and Celine. Jesse is an American writer on a train to Vienna to catch a plane back to the states. Celine is on the same train heading back to Paris, where she is a student. They begin talking, and realize they have a connection. So Jesse comes up with the idea that even though they don't know much about each other, they should get off the train and spend the evening in Vienna. The rest of the movie involves them walking and talking around the city as the time for their departure grows closer. Will they just have this one night? Will they ever see each other again?
 
Man, I loved this movie. First off, i don't know if I've ever seen a couple with such true chemistry onscreen as these two. They act the heck out of their roles. Even though most of the movie is talking, it's never boring. The conversations aren't just clever, witty jokes. They delve deep into their fears, dreams, philosophies, and frustrations. I would compare Richard Linklater's direction in this film to the best films of Kevin Smith, although this movie is better than any of those for a few crucial reasons. First, the movie is not crass, crude, or vulgar. It's about the sweetness of young love and the magic of making a connection. Second, the dialogue is not centered around something as trivial and shallow as pop culture. It's about expressing the things that are deepest to us, that make us human. I can see this becoming one of my favorite love stories, just for that reason. And I want to dash off this weekend and see the sequel and see what happened six months later and why they didn't meet.
 
A logical movie to follow this up with was last year's superb Lost in Translation. I've written about my love for this movie on this site before. I know some get frustrated with it, because it doesn't have much of a plot at all and the characters never seem to open up about whether or not they're in love. But I still love this movie, despite it's admitted frustrations. Like Before Sunrise, it's about making a connection. Only in this film, Bob and Charlotte are so frustrated and so lost (being foreigners in Tokyo is a nice metaphor for that) in their lives. I noticed that the earlier scenes play slow and quiet and that the scenes between Bob and Charlotte have a real kick and energy to them that I think speaks more to the power of love and connections than a script can. These characters are drifting through their time in Tokyo, feeling like something's missing. When they're together, they come alive. The movie never gets vulgar and the two never cross any lines that a lesser movie would throw in for titilation. It's a sweet movie about connections in the things we don't say. There is so much to love about the movie. Sofia Coppola's writing is so minimal and brave and her direction is a love letter to the beautiful country of Japan. But the acting is the best part about this. Bill Murray is perfect as world-weary actor Bob Harris, a man who can be funny, but is really the crying clown. Scarlett Johanssen is just adorable as Charlotte and there's such a radiance and beauty to her character in this movie.
 
I think, however, I actually prefer Before Sunrise. And that may change as I grow older. But for now, those characters are where I am, feeling the things that I feel and thinking the thoughts I think. If you've never seen either movie, run out and get them. I know it's rare for a guy to recommend love stories, but these are two gems. They are not "chick flicks," with insane complications and sappy shows of emotion. Rather, they are honest and sweet odes to love.
 
I think the reason I love those movies is because they really speak to what's important about love. I don't care about the fact that I'm not "dating" right now. Dating is overrated. It's an excuse so many times just to not be alone. To have someone to fill hours that you feel are wasted with yourself. To make yourself feel better because you know someone likes you. I think in many instances dating is the opposite of love, because it can be so selfish and one-sided. We want to be with someone because they make us feel good about ourselves. But love is not self-serving. So I feel the dating scene is overrated. And so many "love stories" are simply "dating stories." They worry about the big moments and the feelings of fluttering hearts and big kisses.
 
But I look forward and yearn for falling in love, which is what the best love stories (these two, Say Anything, Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind) are about. Making a connection. Having someone who gets you, not for things you have in common but because you both realize that each other is a precious, unique human being. Love of this kind makes you forget about yourself and do whatever you can to make the other person is happy, even if it means distancing yourself or biting your tongue and putting your wants behind you. I hate dating because it cheapens the idea of love.
 
And now, it's 12:30 on a Saturday, I'm still in my pajamas, and I need to shower and clean up.
 
C-Dubbs