Brandon (my roomate) is wondering how many people will actually care enough to take a look at this each day. While I think he has a valid point--my life isn't exactly exciting--I think it's worth noting that I don't necessarily write all this so that everyone can read it. Sometimes you just have thoughts you want to get out. Although I hope people read it and maybe take away some insight from it.

By the way, pardon any errors I have in my posts for right now. I'm having some trouble getting used to this submission process and, as a result, some posts are double-posted or such.

Anyway, something my dad told me has been running through my mind this week. Monday when I stopped by for dinner, I was complaining about how much I detest my job. . . which, I do. There's no really getting around that. And he told me "the only reason you're there right now is by choice."

I was thinking about that today. See, I've decided it's definitely time to start looking to make a career move. Nothing against Verizon; as a company, it's been great. But after three years, I'm not holding my breath about the potential for moving up. And the job, at the risk of sounding prideful, is honestly beneath my capabilities. You need a GED for it. . . and I'm pursuing my MBA right now. Plus, it's gotten to the point where it's had an affect on my health to some degree. Not physically, but mentally. I'm very tense and stressed out come five o'clock and if you catch me ont he wrong day, this job can actually make you a bit depressed. Just something about being in such a negative environment. Customers don't call to say "good work." They call to complain about their bills and yell, scream, and swear. And while I'm good at what I do, that doesn't mean I have to keep doing it.

So what's holding me back from jumping ship? Golden handcuffs, for one (a phrase I learned in school and from Dilbert.) When a company offers you as many benefits as Verizon does, it's hard to leave. I get an obscene amount of vacation and personal time, great health benefits, tuition reimbursment, and the pay isn't bad at all. And when you look at those things, it's hard to give them up. I always vowed I would never stay at a job just for money, but when you enter the real world it's definitely a consideration you have to look at.

The other thing is definitely fear. I've been at VZW for going on four years in May. Before that, I was a cashier at Sam's Club! I don't have much office experience. Where would I go? What would I do? But that's a typical fear, I guess. Truth is, with my communications degree, customer service background, and the business skills I'm acquiring at Phoenix, I'm probably a very marketable individual. But much like falling in love, taking that jump to a new career is terrifying.

I used to look at my background as a hinderance. I studied journalism and got my degree in that. I've worked customer service for four years in a call center. And now I'm pursuing a marketing degree that I won't have until June, 2005. And for the longest time, I've been fearing that I'm being pigeon-holed.

But if I start looking now, I can be prepared down the road for whatever I decide to pursue. Maybe I can go back and do some freelancing. Maybe dust off my portfolio and look back at journalism. Go to another call center, but as a manager, something Verizon's not offering to me. Public Relations. The idea of teaching is even something I've been thinking more about. Going back after my master's and getting my teaching certificate, and teaching in high school, middle school. Even without a certificate, I could still teach undergrad classes at college once I have my master's.

It all depends on perspective, I guess. I can look at things one way and see myself stuck at Verizon for an undetermined amount of time. But I think the way I want to choose looking at it is as a person who's at Verizon taking his time to carefully explore every opportunity so that when God opens a door, I can walk through and use the gifts He's given me to the best of my ability.

Well, that's about it for tonight. Chappelle's show comes on in about 15 minutes and I have to pack a lunch for tomorry and put the coffee on. Thanks for enduring my blathering!

Any questions, comments, complaints, or queries? E-mail me at
cdubbs727@msn.com


Until we chat again!
C-Dubbs